Prompted by a post that Inspector Gadget did I realised the past week or so we've had three bomb scares in Cheltenham. Three!
One due to the carelessness of one of our local bus drivers, they were doing a security exercise at the depot apparently & the bus wasn't supposed to go out on the route. Obviously the driver wasn't listening because he promptly left the depot with a suspicious package sat happily on the back seat.....
Not that the locals were particularly bothered by this because it took something like three hours for somebody* to get worried enough to say something to the driver, who had forgotten all about it & even the mention of it failed to jog his memory so decided to call the police who then called the local bomb disposal unit out from the Forest. Oooooh the excitement!
*a tourist, has to be because most of the locals wouldn't notice if the Queen took to streaking down the high street while singing a Sex Pistols hit.
Some student or old lady was the cause of the second one, a bag was left on a bench or something & when they came back after searching Cheltenham high & low finally remembering the left package on the prom, found that it had helpfully been blown to kingdom come!
& last but not least is this bright person.
It makes me wonder if somewhere in the green hills of Gloucester there isn't a syndicate going on in some shed or barn or particularly daring W.I.
Odds as to how many parcels & packages you can get blown up in one week. A personal best maybe? Most imaginatively placed? Longest your package can go without being spotted? How many miles of police tape can be used in your particular case? Or how about how many times you can piss the bomb disposal squad off in a calendar month?
Mind you when some bright spark has the GCHQ building built in the shape of a giant doughnut visible from so many thousands of feet up & a local landmark from the Cotswold hills then is it surprising everyone is on their gaurd?! Personally I feel it could be a bit more noticeable, the very least they could do is stick a neon flashing sign on the roof with maybe an X marks the spot in the middle. Honestly, no consideration for those that aren't likely to notice it.
Baring in mind that GCHQ deals with all the government secrets, security measures, MI5 & the fact it is covered in razor wire, individual compounds which you have to pass through before you get to the hallowed entrance it probably wasn't the best idea that particular architect had. It is so hyper about security that the phone lines belonging to the houses surrounding it are randomly tapped.
If it does get blown up that's biggest part of my family gone in one fell swoop but as my cousin helpfully remarked;
"it's built in a circle so if it does get hit then it won't matter because the bomb will land in the middle"
Yes, I can see the logic of that as bombs do tend to fall in a dead straight line & confine themselves to a distance of two feet maximum.....
Whoever said yokels don't exist?!?!
Obviously terrorism is the last thing on the mind of Gloucester's inhabitants as they had other, far more important matters on their mind.